Vows tips for your destination wedding
Marriage vows are at the heart of every wedding ceremony. Undoubtedly, vows truly make you understand exactly why you are all there honoring and celebrating the love of the couple, and also the beautiful commitment the couple is entering into. Exchanging vows in public could be a nerve-wracking experience: to speak out-loud a series of binding and sentimental statements can be an emotional situation, especially since most of us are not used to speaking publicly. But thankfully, you will be doing this at your beautiful destination wedding, with the company of the dearest people in your life; so let’s help you get to it! Here are some of my marriage vows tips:
What should you say in your wedding vows?
First, the tone:
This is actually a very big deal. First, take the time to prepare your vows by sitting down in a quiet space with paper and pen, where your concentration won’t be interrupted. It’s hard to be inspired at the last minute (when your head may be full of final wedding details), so give yourself enough time to write your vows before your big day.
- Agree with your partner a tone: would you like your vows to have a romantic, poetic tone? Or do you prefer humor to lighten the mood? Would you like to write them together or separately? Either way, it would be best to have your and your partner’s vows sound well-matched.
- Don’t be cryptic by using inside jokes between the two of you that only you would know. Be respectful to your guests at your wedding, and speak about the love you both have for each other and that they can undoubtedly see between the two of you, which will help make them feel included. Don’t use words or nicknames that only you two know, or that others can’t understand.
- If one of you feels more comfortable expressing his/her feeling’s with poetry, song lyrics, or texts from films or books, this would be a wonderful option. Sometimes it’s easier to quote or echo someone else’s words or thoughts. This way, you can still have the chance to express your sentiments and emotions, without feeling so vulnerable.
Consider your relationship for your vows:
- I know that it’s very hard to sum up years of dating into a couple of minutes, so you could start off by saying something that you know will make your partner smile, something light-hearted just to serve as a bit of an ice-breaker in the moment. Just remember to use humor in moderation, since you are not expected to make your guests laugh, as they might during a comedy routine!
- Think about how your life was before meeting your partner. For example, what did you dream of when you were a little child, teenager, or even young adult? Did you dream of your wedding day? What kind of person did you imagine marrying in the future, and speak about how this concept is so well-matched with your partner now.
- Think about the most important moments, hard times you’ve gone through together, what you’ve supported each other through, what makes your relationship tick, or how it remains strong. You could speak about the first time you met each other, your first date, sweet moments of your daily life together, or special first occasions like trips taken together, birthdays, etc. You could even speak about the moment you first fell in love, and the moment in which you realized that the person standing across from you was the one you wanted to marry.
- Talk about the qualities that you most love in your partner, why you admire him/her, the aspects that make you different from each other, and how his/her presence has forever changed your life for the better.
Think about your future together, and make your promises for your wedding vows:
- Take inspiration from the most important moments you have spent together and think about your hopes and challenges for the future, the dreams you have and will achieve, how you think it will be to grow old together, etc.
- Make promises. What do you feel you want to promise, here and now, to your partner? Think about the values that are most important to you.
The wedding officiant’s role:
- The officiant is a professional with a particular sensibility and touch. He or she can really help you express your unique love story during your big day. Therefore, tell him/her your love story, something about you the two of you, how you feel, what you expect, what makes you feel comfortable (and uncomfortable). And, if you are not sure about the written structure of your thoughts, ask him/her to review your vows together before the ceremony. You can trust this person to give you helpful advice!
- Last but not the least: the most important thing is to keep your vows authentic to who you truly are.
On your wedding day, tips on reading your wedding vows out-loud:
- Look at your partner: be concentrated on your significant other, since it truly is all about the love you have for each other.
- Keep your breathing under control: when you are nervous, it’s easier to forget to breathe properly. Think about the exact words you have to say, and listen to yourself when you pronounce them. Pause, and breathe deeply every time you need to.
- Don’t forget to smile: although you are talking about the serious and deep subject of loving another person, it still should be one of the most emotional and happiest moments of your life, so allow your joy to come through!
- Your posture and position: don’t stand with your back to the guests, but rather, turn to the side so that your guests will feel included in this moment. Also, make sure to stand up straight; not only will make it easier for you to breathe, but it will also help you feel ready for the moment!
How to prepare yourself:
- Practice makes perfect! Review your vows numerous times, so that you can be confident on your wedding day. Once you have the final version, train yourself by pronouncing words in different ways, or even singing or shouting or whispering! Afterwards, when you return to speaking normally after these verbal exercises, your tone of voice will be much stronger and clearer.
- If you can, try to memorize your vows; but if you don’t feel completely confident in the order of the words or phrases, go ahead and write them down on a note card.
I really love civil weddings, so if you need a good officiant, feel free to contact me. I can recommend English-speaking officiants whom you can meet on Skype before your wedding, in order to customize your ceremony perfectly!
I really love civil weddings, so if you need a good officiant, feel free to contact me . I can recommend English-speaking officiants whom you can meet on Skype before your wedding, in order to customize your ceremony perfectly!
Photo Credit Pinterest.
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